7.25.2010

Broken-heart,twice,with the same guy.

I met this guy last holiday.
At first time,I didnt attracted to him,even I'm more attracted to his friend.
I mean,I was looking at them bcs they were standing behind me.
It's normal right?

An Indian boy n his family made some problem with the staffs so they made us wait. They wouldn't let the boy with height less than 122 to get on the ride.
After the ride,me,mom and bro went to another ride and met them again.

I didn't know how,but he suddenly introduce himself,and asked my name
.
It happened too fast.
Among three of them he was the only one who talked a lot.
I've been paying attention to them bcs the queue was very long.
We talked for a while. The Indian boy made the same problem with the staffs from this ride also,and we need to wait,again. I feel lucky actually... and he asked for my facebook,he said he's goin to add me at night.
How dare,he touched my hair,and tell me it was wet bcs of the ride,I quickly put my hat on. I was shy.
Then,he offered to accompany me in the rollercoaster,in the ride,he shouted like a mad guy,and he asked me to shout too,but im not scared at all and i couldn't shout. I feel silly.
At the end we split up bcs he's goin home. He was lookin for me (i guess) and he told me that he hope to see me again.
I kept telling myself that I'm not attracted to him,but I'm unconsciously waiting for him. I can't access the internet,so i went to the internet cafe and wasted 45000idr for an hour access which is only 3000idr here.
I waited from 9 till 11 p.m. but no signs afterall.
So I thought he was just playing a trick.

The next day I was home and found out,he added me. I couldn't stop smiling.
He sent me a message and call me honey.
Later on,I knew he called all the girls honey,babe,hun,dear,etc.
I felt angry,but i have no reason to. I thought he has the right.
But I wanted to punch him.

Right several days after that,his status was in a relationship. I felt like my heart was broken into pieces. That time,I realized that I want him,I liked him.

I congratulated him,and he looks happy. but he still calls me honey.
I can't help myself that i want to hit him right on his face.
I thought it was over.

The next several days,he said he's single. He broke up with his gf.
I don't know what to say, I feel kinda happy,but......something's wrong with him..
So I thought it's another chance,another hope.
I won't really care if he didnt act so sweet to me.
We did webcams,I thought he is a good guy cs we chat,and he said I look like an angel although i told him that i can't cook.
He knows how flatter a girl very well.
We were both listening to Enrique's song,I felt so excited.

He always give me a kiss goodnight icon,and hug. He really made me fell for him.I need to say that I was really naive bcs i didn't realize that he might do that to all the girls he knew..

Another day,we chat. He told me he wanted to see me in Indonesia,but he is going to Bali and I told him I'm in Medan,he was dissapointed. He said he will online at night and see me.

The next day,I was at school and he suddenly called me from YM.
Bcs usually I was the one who calls him first.
I couldn't agree more,I was so excited. He said he was sorry bcs he didn't online last night.
I was too happy that I couldn't concentrate during my tuition.

On my birthday,he greeted me. I forgot how,but he told me he liked me,and he asked me if I like him too. I said probably. He said I'm his girl,so I asked him if I could call him "papa" he said he wanted me to call him honey. I asked him what name will he call me with,and he answered "pure love". I didn't understand so I asked if he is serious,and he said yes.

But after those sweet days,he never call me anymore,I feel sick and tired and unpatient bcs im the only one who always call him.
I'm a lady after all and I want him to care more abt me,but he never do.

So,I dont want to call him anymore,although sometimes I cant resist.
I saw him online,with the green dot beside his name,I waited for hours,I was denying that I was waiting for him,till i saw the green dot suddenly turned white.
I felt dissapointed.

I've always trying to ignore all the feelings when I saw his name,and his pictures.
The only reason I was online at night was bcs i was waitng for him to call me.I'm still exist in facebook bcs of him,else I'll be throwing it away.

But that won't ever happen anymore. Today,when I signed in to my facebook,his name and picure was on top. With the label "In a Relationship with".
I were shocked,my heart beats fast.
I couldn't believe what I saw,this time,it's really called a broken-heart.
I checked on his profile and his girl's. He is serious,last time he didn't state his girl's name,but this time,he do. It was really over.

I thought I have no feelings to him anymore,but now I realize that I was still hoping.
I told myself Men are REALLYjerks.
But I am the one who was in love with the jerk.

Hopefully he's serious,so he wont hurt anyone,anymore. Or I'm the only who's too innoncent?
I was fooled,I might knew him,but I denied.
He didn't worth me.
People might think this is nothing,bcs it happened indirectly.
I didn't love him,but I really I liked him,and I was fooled by a guy I like,that's what hurts me. Thanks I didn't go any further.

I hope I can handle myself.
This will be a lesson for me.
Let the sweet memories be memories.

P.S. I love you will soon become P.S I hate you

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